perkyshadowgirl (perkyshadowgirl) wrote in house_quotes,

i haven't checked this community uber some of these may have been posted before...but i don't think so, so :)

besides, it's always fun to see them again!


HOUSE: Your lips say no, but your shoes say yes.
WILSON: They're French, you can't trust a word they say.


FOREMAN: She drew these. [laying several hand-drawn comic books out on table] They might give us a clue.
HOUSE: [picks one up] She sign them? Her name would be a start.
FOREMAN: All the mythology, the locations, they’re all dependant on life experience.
HOUSE: [holds up comic book and looks at it] Philadelphia. Look at that skyline! It’s very evocative. The Chrysler Building.
[The ducklings move in to see that House is looking at a picture of a slightly surreal looking desert landscape.]
FOREMAN: That’s a cloud.
CAMERON: And the Chrysler Building’s in New York.
HOUSE: Mmm… I’m getting Philly. And that cactus, well, that’s a smashed car – car accident.
CAMERON: [doesn’t sound convinced] A cactus in Philadelphia?
HOUSE: Water – well, water’s October, right?
WILSON: Obviously.
HOUSE: On the page number 22, so that’s October 2nd, 2002. Ergo, the patient was in a car accident two years ago last October.
WILSON: [quite calmly] My goodness! Was she okay?
HOUSE: [squints] Broke her arm, I think. They fixed it – with this. [holds up metal pin]
[Ducklings look relieved to have an explanation.]
HOUSE: Surgical pin. Better than a wallet. Serial numbers in case of recall, tied to a patient’s name.


[Ducklubgs are giving House their diagnosis of a patient]
CHASE: Oligoclonal bands, and an increase of intrathecal IGG.
HOUSE: Which means multiple sclerosis. And the reason it takes three of you to tell me this?
CAMERON: Because we’re having a disagreement about whether or not it is MS.
CHASE: No lesions on the MRI.
FOREMAN: It’s early; he’s had the disease for maybe two weeks.
CAMERON: McDonald criteria requires six months to make a definitive diagnosis.
HOUSE: Oh, who cares about McPherson? I hear he tortured kittens.
FOREMAN: McDonald.
HOUSE: Oh, McDonald. Wonderful doctor, loved kittens.
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